Thursday, March 26, 2009

waiting for a baby

I am trying to be so patient through this whole adoption. We have done everything we needed to do and now we just have to wait. That is hard to do and that is the hardest part. It feels like when we went through in-vetro and you had to wait the 2 weeks to see if the eggs took to find out if you were pregnant or not. Those two weeks felt like the longest two weeks of my life. That is what I would compare this too but we don't have a time frame which makes it even harder. Ever day just waiting and hoping that our social worker will call and say your baby is here. I can't think of what else I can do to spread the word. We put up fliers in 3 colleges and I have gone to OBGYN offices and they look at you like you are crazy and they say the patient and the hospital figures that stuff out they tell me. I called the hospitals to see what there process is when someone comes in and says they didn't know they were pregnant or they get to the hospital and say they don't want a baby or even if they drop the baby off at the hospital like I have reed about, but the hospitals already have a process they go through. They work with a social worker and if the mom doesn't want the baby they have adoption agencies they already work with. I have contacted our social worker to see what more we can do and she says we have done everything we can. She said her agency is also contacted by a few hospitals but I hear the hospital calls a few agencies and who ever gets there first the agency gets the child. I hope this doesn't sound crazy but I want a baby so bad. I keep hearing from people that I haven't even been in this adoption for even a year yet but what I feel like they don't understand is that I have been trying and waiting to have a baby for years. I started this adoption in July and yes that would make me somewhat new to adoption but I am willing to try anything to hold a baby in my arms. I just can't wait to have a child and consider us a family instead of a couple. Thank you for listening and just letting me vent. I had something funny to add. So I see cute baby stuff at the store and I will pick it up. Now it is not like I have a whole closet or anything but I have like 8 to 10 things from me or my mother in-law will give to me. Well the other day my husband Tim came in the house and told me to close my eyes and he put (of course a boy) baby outfit in front of me that he picked up at the store. He told me between my mother in-law and I picking up stuff, he said he figured he would pick up something and maybe he would be the good luck charm. I thought that was so cute and sweet of him. He said my mother in-law and and were not bringing the luck and now he is. I just wanted to share that because I thought it was thoughtful and nice. Well thanks again for reading

1 comment:

  1. When we first started the process in April 2007 we were so excited. Our caseworker wouldn't give us a time frame (smart guy), but we knew a few people.

    Like a guy I work with. They adopted 16 years ago. Home study in Sept., baby was born in Jan. So they waited months. But then we met others who waited longer than a "normal" pregnancy.

    We've now been approved 14 months. When we first started someone suggested that we tell friends and family not to ask how it was going. Just tell them that we would share news when it came. But I wanted everyone to ask! Now I am starting to understand. I have started telling people that it's the same as it was a year ago, let alone the same as when they asked last week/month/whatever.

    We too have purchased a few things. If I have to buy something for a baby shower I buy something for us too. I have a few boy things and a few girl things. I figure they'll get used eventually. I've even taken from that stash a few times when I needed an last minute gift I didn't know about.

    I hope I don't discourage you. But patience seems to be the "name of the game" when it come to adoption. I keep thinking I will finally get used to it, but I don't. I hate waiting and I hate that I have no control. I have even considered canceling our because I feel like we are throwing money away sometimes.

    Sigh, it sounds like I should tell you and myself to hang in there. When it happens it will all be worth it. Yadda, yadda, yadda! Don't you get sick of hearing that? I know I do. I have started to tell people that they could help by finding me a baby. I don't think they realize I am dead serious.

    It sounds like you are doing all you can. Just keep trying to get the word out. You really don't know where your baby came from. I once heard that "everyone knows someone who is pregnant or knows of someone else that know someone who is pregnant."

    Keep talking, I enjoy reading your blog. It's uplifting to me to know that we aren't alone in this infertile world.